Written by Collins_and_Dutton

Thursday, 16 April 2009

image for Citibank release "ambiguous" Q1 earnings

Suprise hit the banking community today as Citibank released their 2009 Q1 earnings summary.

Widely hailed by banking experts as being a likely barometer as to whether the economy is recovering, it appears the focus and widespread scrutiny of the results pushed Citi CEO Vikram Pandit too far.

The results, a 128 page summary, has had all of the decimal points removed from the document prior to issue, and furthermore (and indeed more concerning) is the removal of all minus / negative signs.

Finally, some part of key numbers appeared to have question marks typed over them.

As such, the Q1 net position for the multi-national bank can only be confirmed as beginning with a 4, and ending with a 6. Whether the total is a profit or a loss, remains a mystery.

Given the confusion around the performance, the Citi share price rose 6%.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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