Freddie Mac Investigating Itself, Totally Shocked!

Funny story written by Bureau

Tuesday, 24 February 2009

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Freddie Mac Investigating One Investigator On TV

Freddie Mac's own internal lawyers hired by mortgage finance giant Freddie Mac are quietly investigating the firm's own $2 million lobbying campaign, according to the Associated Press, and say they are shocked by the way they have been running their finances.

"The lobbying efforts we used in an effort to help quash proposed new regulations on this company before the housing market collapsed, was downright criminal!"

It was not immediately clear how much Freddie Mac is spending on itself to investigate its own conduct or whether it is spending any federal bailout money on the internal probe. The firm was placed under U.S. government control due to its massive investment losses.

"Every single one of us here ought to be locked up and the key thrown away", stated another badly shaken investigator.

The group has spent more than a month interviewing current and former Freddie Mac employees and executives, according to former Freddie Mac employees and executives who are the most familiar with themselves.

The Freddie Mac investigators say that they will offer to get back every penny they can, although not much is left, and submit themselves to a public flogging at the Washington Nationals Baseball Stadium where 40,000 people can watch.

The event will be aired by FOX which made the highest bid for the televised flogging, hosted by Geraldo Rivera.

The funds raised by the program will pay over .0001% of what's owed the government.

"It's a start", stated one finance manager.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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