A new 22,575-page Beatles anthology/biography will be released next summer, according to little-known author and self-proclaimed Beatles expert, George Lennon-McCartney.
"I've got everything you ever wanted to know about the Beatles in there so the $95.00 price tag is really quite small", Lennon-McCartney told the Sun Daily Monday. "There's even a picture taken by a hidden camera of Paul in his coffin.
That's not the real Paul out there you know. The present one is the fifth. The fourth died when Heather beat him to death with that artificial leg. It's sort of like that Bryan Jones who actually was ran over while skiing by a young Sonny Bono. That story will be in my next book."
"Everything in this book is checked and double-checked and is authenticated by my brother, Ringo Lennon-McCartney."
Among other little-known facts about the Beatles, Lennon-McCartney lists:
In 1965, the band played three different shows with Leonard Cohen & Lou Reed singing lead as John and Paul had the runs.
The first Paul was electrocuted in 1967 when he lost his footing and fell into an electric fan with his feet in Ringo puke.
"A Day In The Life" has a coded message hid in it that makes you crave spotted dick.
When played backwards, She Loves You sounds like "Uoy Sevol Ehs, Hay, Hay, Hay!"
In 1969, John stated that the Beatles were bigger than Mama Cass, especially Paul.
The third Paul was also fatally shot in front of the Dakota.
The second Paul, who was pudgy, died while attempting to beat Cool Hand Luke's record by eating 51 boiled eggs.
During their first NYC concert performance George soiled himself when stepping on a live wire, survived, but would always "react the same way" whenever they sang "Twist & Shout" so he quit singing it and just yelled a lot.
Yoko Ono has survived over 2,000 attempts on her life since the Beatles split, plus her voice driving people mad.
Lennon-McCartney says he will start his 24,000-page book on the Rolling Stones as soon as this new Beatles anthology/biography hits, breaks the stands.
