Written by Puppetmaster

Friday, 7 May 2004

image for Rumsfeld Under Fire From ASPCA

Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld came under fire today amidst allegations leveled by The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty of Animals. Officials at the ASPCA argue that Rumsfeld's plan of training seeing-eye-Iraqi's undermines the efforts at the ASPCA and circumvents the mission of this Government sponsored program. "We invest a lot of time and effort into each potential seeing-eye-dog candidate.

Taxpayer dollars fund these programs and the idea that this function is being farmed out to the Middle East is just appalling" expounds Louis Mcnaulty, head of the ASPCA's legal team. "Not alone will the influx of uselessness for our sweltering pound populations cripple resources, there also now exists a possibility that in the history of the ASPCA has heretofore gone unthinkable," Mcnaulty adds. " Never has there existed any likelihood, that one of our seeing-eye-dogs would deliver explosives to openly populated locations on American soil".

Secretary Rumsfeld could not be reached for comment.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Animals, Fire

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