Would You Buy A Used Car From Hillary Clinton?

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

image for Would You Buy A Used Car From Hillary Clinton?

Smarty-pants voters use to question the trust worthiness of Richard Nixon by asking, "Yeah, but would you buy a used car from him?" Today, the same question can be raised about Hillary Clinton, "Yeah, but would you buy a used car from her?"

With the series of fables, stories and lies she's created to promote her political experience starting from day one, trust has become a serious question. Like missing tires on a used car, a candidate can't move forward without trust. Calling it a "misspoke" only after being caught on film, is like trying to turn back the speedometer.

As Groucho Marx said, "Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes?"

Bringing about peace in Northern Ireland, S-Chip and Bosnia, described like the Steven Spielberg landing on Normandy in Saving Private Ryan, has raised doubts in the most roaring of Hillary supporters.

"She said what? And they have her on film, but it's looking like Audery Hepburn landing in Paris in Funny Face?"

"Who you going to believe, me or your lying eyes?"

Then the other half of the used car stepped forward to defend his wife, saying, "A sixty-year-old woman forgets things late at night.." He claimed the "misspoke" was due to sleep deprivation. And this forgetful sixty-year-old woman should have her finger on the nuclear button?

The transmission, carburetor and engine are missing.

Can't forget Clinton strategist, Mark Penn, who received over $300,000 to lobby for a Colombian trade deal that Hillary claims to oppose; while hubby Bill was paid $800,000 to help promote the same trade deal.

Then there are the bags of money the Clintons made in the last eight years. Tax returns reveal they made $109 million in eight years. That figure must be a bitter harvest for the disenfranchised in small towns throughout the nation who have lost jobs, pensions and healthcare due to the NAFTA trade deal both Clintons promoted. Hillary's used car might be missing a number of parts, but it do appear to have one bottomless trunk.

So, would you buy a used car from Hillary?

Read more by this author:

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more