Florida Announces Key Viagra

Written by Warren Redlich

Wednesday, 27 February 2008

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image for Florida Announces Key Viagra
Key Viagra on a map, showing all the islands of Islamorada

Florida Governor Charlie Crist announced today that Islamorada, one of the Florida Keys, is being renamed Key Viagra. The change is expected to boost tourism both by addressing fears about Muslims and by encouraging tourists interested in improving their sex lives. Pfizer, the pharmaceutical company that owns Viagra, will pay $10 million a year to the State of Florida for the naming rights.

"Too many people got confused about the name Islamorada," noted Crist. The name derives from the Spanish phrase "isla morada" (purple island), but the two words are written together so it appears to start with "Islam." With concerns about Islamophobia and Islamofascism appearing frequently in the news, tourists trips to Islamorada were down nearly 2% in the last month. Islamorada is to the southwest of the more famous Key Largo, and approximately 80 miles northeast of Key West.

The change to Key Viagra will have an uncertain impact on tourism, but Crist and local officials are optimistic. "Many people find the Florida Keys to be something of an aphrodisiac," said Islamorada Village Council member Kevin Federline (no relation to Britney Spears ex-husband). "It's similar to the effect of taking Viagra."

Crist indicated that Florida is open to further use of naming rights. Lake Okeechobee is said to be open for possible renaming to Lake Levitra, and the Everglades might be appropriate for either ED or longevity medications.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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