Standoff continues at Holiest Shrine in US

Funny story written by Dr A Friend

Tuesday, 20 April 2004

image for Standoff continues at Holiest Shrine in US
St Falluja looks down on the standoff at the Warbucks holy shrine

A standoff continues today at the Warbucks Building in Najaf Street, New York City. Situated at the centre of the Moral Desert neighbourhood of the holy city, the Warbucks Building is the holiest place in the USA and millions of pilgrims a year come to worship at this revered site and to renew their vows to the Almighty Greenback.

Thousands of angry pensioners have blockaded the religious site for two weeks in protest at alleged deception and fraud in accounting practices at the Do-ron-ron chapter of the Warbucks sect.

"We didn't spend our whole lives paying in our hard earned salaries and fighting in the oil wars to have our retirement savings stolen by these crooks", exclaimed spokesman General Tommy Hanks, veteran star of the film "Shaving Jessica's Private Parts".

The general's feelings were shared by the majority of the vexed vets, who suspected sinister goings-on inside the building. One angry protester explained, "Every day someone quite normal goes into the building to ring a strange bell and chant an evil mantra about God blessing the Greenback".

"When they come out the effect of that bloody bell seems to make them lose all reason and they just want to start yet another war for profit."

Outside the building, the statue of St Falluja looks down on the protest scene, a symbol of the biggest blunder in the history of the Warbucks sect and the question on everyone's lips is "Will this blunder be repeated?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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