America Dead - Drowned in a Sea of Laws

Funny story written by drugtestallpoliticians

Sunday, 20 January 2008

image for America Dead - Drowned in a Sea of Laws
We've lost her, sir.

Washington - The United States was declared dead today by the Federal Morgue. The cause of death was listed as drowning.

The drowning of America took place in the vast and endless Sea of Laws. There are 75,000 pages of laws governing American citizens. There are so many laws that it is impossible to step out of your house without breaking some laws and staying home is just as dangerous.

It has been reported that one reason that there are so many laws is because it is much easier to get a job as a Congressman or Representative at the state and federal level than it is to get a real job flipping hamburgers, mopping floors, or any other form of physically productive employment.

People who apply for menial jobs must first pass a drug test which is simply not required of those with the power to push the nuclear button or take our freedoms and lives away. Once a person becomes a legislator he does not have to break his back manufacturing nor producing anything of value to anyone. He no longer has to do any actual w-o-r-k which is a four letter word to the silver tongued devils feeding at the government trough.

Sadly, for the average member of the public unfortunate enough to get caught up in the jaws of the "justice" system it is not enough to be in mere possession of the truth in order to be found innocent of charges leveled against puny citizens by the omnipotent forces of the government for breaking one of its endless supply of laws. All a prosecutor has to do is to merely prove a theory based on conjecture that a citizen has committed some act against the "people". Through a selective process in the picking of jurors the government can stack the jury against the accused and thus insure that the insatiable appetite of the prison-industrial complex is constantly satisfied.

A maximum of time is guaranteed for the most minimal of offenses.

Members of the government are immune from most laws that apply to everyone else unless they get caught up in a government manufactured crime also known as entrapment. This type of action is directed against dime store variety politicians who have fallen out of favor with the powers that be.

When election time rolls around law makers can point with complete smugness at the laws that they wrote during their term thus demonstrating how good and decent they are. This proves to the voting public that they should re-elect these people (who have never stolen a freight train) so they can return to office for four more years to protect us from ourselves.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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