Litvinenko cops eye US ambassador amid Pentagon cold war revelations

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 9 October 2007

image for Litvinenko cops eye US ambassador amid Pentagon cold war revelations
Secret excavations in Regent's Park woodland behind the US ambassador's residence makes cops suspicious

Washington DC - (Fallout Mess): UK police probing the Plutonium 210 poisoning of ex-KGB turncoat Alexander Litvinenko have dropped a bombshell about a top US diplomatic suspect linked to the Pentagon's cold war espionage secrets.

The former spook died after a horrible 'trick or treat' disaster in London last Halloween which has been routinely blamed on 'pesky Bolsheviks.'

But a twist in events has given an altered perspective on Litvinenko's demise as declassified Pentagon archives are released today showing that the US military has long toyed with the possibilities of using radioactive poisons to assassinate VIPs.

"The American ambassador to the Court of St James's could well be a prime suspect," was all that anti-terror cops in London would say today.

The newly-released archives show that VIPs such as military or civilian leaders were assessed for quickie hit-jobs involving radioactive toxins.

The policy had been approved at the highest levels of the Army since 1952 in what military hysterians believe was the result of the KGB infiltrating the Pentagon.

"We're not exactly saying that Ambassador Robert 'Katie' Holmes Tuttle is a KGB cold war throwback plant," said a police source.

"But have you ever wondered why so much covert excavation has been taking place recently behind the Ambassadorial official residence in Regent's Park?

"It sure don't look like truffles they're foraging for in them there wood, either!" a Friends Of Regents Park source added darkly.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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