Anti-Bigotry Drug Shows Promise

Written by Rumplestilskin

Thursday, 26 July 2007

image for Anti-Bigotry Drug Shows Promise

Medical journals have reported that early trials of a new anti-bigotry drug have shown promising results. The drug, known as "antiprej", was recently tested on a group of Bush Administration policymakers and officials from some well-known conservative foundations in the United States.

The head of one foundation, who asked to remain anonymous, raved about the drug's effectiveness: "I used to hate the poor, the downtrodden, and anyone who'd ever been a patient in the mental health system. I scoured the news reports for any kind of violent, heinous crime I could find, and then I checked to see if the perpetrator was homeless or had ever received any kind of psychiatric treatment.

If they had, I used my foundation's money to make sure everything about the crime was publicized far and wide. But if the perpetrator had previously been a part of mainstream society, then I just ignored the story. My entire purpose was to defame society's outsiders and most vulnerable members by associating them with violent crime and dangerousness.

Since taking antiprej, however, I now see that all I was doing was making life harder for many innocent people whose lives were already very difficult. I suddenly realized that many so-called 'normal' people were more likely to be violent and dangerous than those outside the mainstream of society, and that my actions were adding to the misery of people who already endured some very harsh circumstances. I felt ashamed of what I had done."

All members of the original trial group received an undisclosed amount of money for their participation. It is generally acknowledged that without that incentive, some people who might benefit from taking antiprej never would. And since it wouldn't be feasible to pay everyone for taking the drug, there is a potential problem. Because some people who are extremely bigoted don't even realize it, they might refuse to take the drug voluntarily.

Backers of the drug said that forcing it on people would probably require some kind of special legislation, and there might be civil rights problems involved. Based on this, they said that forcing antiprej on law-abiding citizens might ultimately be more trouble than it's worth.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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