Second Saddam double arrested in Guantanamo

Funny story written by Martin Kugler

Monday, 5 January 2004

image for Second Saddam double arrested in Guantanamo
Saddam look-alikes protesting against cigar ban

After the spectacular arrest of the first double of Saddam Hussein in December our sources report the arrest of another impersonator of Iraq's former leader currently held in the Guantanamo facility in Cuba.

The incident became known when the inmate identified simply as Saddam lodged a complaint with the prison's military authorities for not being allowed to buy Cuban cigars. The prisoner claimed that since Guantamo Bay is not under US jurisdiction trade sanctions, embargos and international treaties do not apply and need not be complied with. Therefore he should be allowed to purchase Cuban cigars.

Saddam systematically used several look-alikes as decoys as he dodged assassins during his reign of terror.

There were most likely many doubles being prepared for many months first by flattery by another of the doubles they believed to be the real Saddam. Then after repeated drugging and brain washing the Guantanamo prisoner referred to as Saddam was persuaded he was the real Saddam.

US authorities also appealed to the UN's Kofi Annan as a witness and expert as he claimed he "smoked a cigar with him [the real Saddam], six cigars, and he is a man I can do business with".

However extensive DNA testing on cigars preferred by the Guantanamo prisoner have shown evidence that they did not originate from the island and thus exposed the prisoner as a fake Saddam. The real Saddam Hussein would never have chosen such bad cigars.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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