BILLINGSGATE POST: For those who wish to live in a world where a wayward chicken’s motives are not questioned when he crosses a road, they will be disappointed.
Foghorn Leghorn, a bombastic rooster with a penchant for mischief, was apprehended by Sheriff Henery Hawk while crossing a street in Hokum, Alabama.
Foghorn, who fancies himself a mentor figure for oppressed poultry, responded to his apprehension with his usual bluster. Tossing off the Sheriff’s request for information as to why he was sauntering across the main thoroughfare of Hokum during the Crow-Ona Virus Epidemic, he dressed down Sheriff Hawk:
“Look at me when I’m talkin’ to ya, boy,” he bellowed with his Southern accent.
“Pay attention, son. I’m only gonna tell you once. Keep your chickin’ pickin’ mitts offa me, or I’m gonna kick some Hawk ass.”
“Trust me, son. This Crow-Ona Virus epidemic is nothin but henhouse chatter.”
With that, Foghorn softy hummed the lyrics of “Camptown Races”, while loudly singing the refrain “Doo-Daah! Doo-Daah Day!”, and ending the verse with “Ohh, Doo-Daah Day!”
Slim: “Apparently, Foghorn doesn’t like anyone questioning his motives for crossing a street.”
Dirty: “Yo, Dude. Don’t f*ck with the Foghorn.”