U.S. Oligarchs edict to Mueller: Don't Implicate Trump

Written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Wednesday, 30 January 2019

Seattle, WA. Meeting secretly at an undisclosed mountain retreat, east of here, last week, ten of the twelve richest men in the nation, with combined wealth exceeding a trillion dollars, issued a confidential order to special counsel Robert Mueller: "Your ongoing investigation must not implicate President Donald Trump."

In a terse message accompanying the edict, the ten investment tycoons, who jokingly refer to themselves as "American oligarchs," outlined the reason why an indictment or any other charge against Trump must not occur.

"Any legal action by you, that brings the president's integrity into question, would immediately turn the nation into domestic turmoil, possibly civil war. Such disruption would stagger the American stock market, bring chaos to the business community and untold hardship to investors. Your investigation must end without any hint of misconduct by the president."

While Mueller has not commented on the edict, he appeared visibly shaken when he read the message, hand delivered by two messengers, one from Microsoft and the other from Berkshire Hathaway.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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