Did Fraud Get Trump Into White House?

Written by K.C. Bell

Saturday, 15 December 2018

image for Did Fraud Get Trump Into White House?
"Guess who really won the White House?"

So, if Donald Trump and partner Mike Pence got into the White House through fraud, doesn’t that mean that they go straight out of the White House and into the jailhouse? Sure, after a trial and all that legal wrangling and finagling, unless they plead guilty to save legal expenses.

Then, who would be the valid winner of the White House? Who is the legitimate president? Yes, the nominee that honestly won the popular vote with over three million votes, (drumroll) without Russian cooperation, hush money payments, stolen emails, (more drumroll) Putin hackers, Julian Assange assistance, hold onto your hats, gentlemen, it’s a lady, and her name is Hillary Rodham Clinton. Or it should be, President Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Fumigate the White House. Set the clocks straight. Get rid of the glitz. Throw away the tanning table. Change all the filters plugged with hairspray. It took over two years, but an American-loving American, who does not believe Nazis are good people, doesn’t lie about her taxes, can spell, and legitimately won the election, is going to move into the White House, and is a grandmother.

Oh my lord, a woman? With all that female baggage and that time of the month? Everybody knows women go straight to crazy after menopause, and even before. They need their valium, Metamucil, flat shoes and rocking chairs, otherwise, everything will just fall out.

Not so fast. Queen Elizabeth II of England is 92 years old and she rides a horse every day. Even canters.

No-one has ever called Hillary Clinton a, ‘f———ing moron’. And Putin can’t stand her. He knows she would slam-dunk him in a heartbeat. Trey Gowdy called many hearings into Benghazi but only succeeded in wasting taxpayer money and raised questions into whether he cuts his hair with a scythe.

There’s an old saying: My country right or wrong. Seldom is the entire saying heard: My country right or wrong. If right kept right. If wrong made right.

The slow methodical and dedicated work of Special Counsel Mueller will have made it right again.

Happy New Year!

Read more by this author:

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more