Written by Wesley Janson

Friday, 5 October 2018

image for Technical Manual Writer Feels That He Is Past His Prime

Minnesota. News reporters rushed to the home of Jonathan Smith last Tuesday, after he allegedly told trusted friend and co-worker, Susan Clemens, that he felt he was past his prime as a writer and that it was time to move on with his life.

Jonathan, 37, attended 4 years of college and earned a degree in English when he was younger, with the dream that his academic training would propel his career as a writer. Upon graduation, Jonathan worked for several companies as a technical manual writer producing instructions for household items such as vacuum cleaners, toasters, microwaves, ovens, and even alarm clocks.

"To be a good writer, you really have to pour your heart and soul into your work. The reader needs to feel the plethora of emotions that you have as they gaze upon the magnificent literature you've produced," Jonathan stated. "Sometimes you have to be brave, and look deep within yourself as you try to find the right words," he added.

When asked at which point he reached his prime as a writer, Jonathan said that it was while he was writing manuals for toasters, microwaves, and ovens.

"That's when I was at my absolute best," he stated. "I kind of burned out after that when I settled for alarm clocks," he sadly confessed.

Finding himself exhausted as a talented writer, and feeling that he has completely used up his own personal voice to express his journey through life in the arena of powerfully-moving literature, Jonathan now plans on starting a new chapter by going back to school next year, so that he can earn a degree in micro-zoology.

"Sometimes you just have to be brave, turn a different corner, and see what new adventure awaits," he concluded.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: life, Writing




Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
53 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more