Bannon Calls for Boycott of Pledge of Allegiance

Written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Friday, 6 October 2017

The boycott of the National Anthem by some NFL players has gained an unexpected ally. Steve Bannon, formerly of the White House staff and once again head of Breitbart News, announced today that he would no longer participate in recital of the Pledge of Allegiance at public meetings.

"No true conservative can say the Pledge in good conscience. While the black players protest against the National Anthem is clearly misguided because the Anthem is innocuous in its content, the Pledge is clearly an attempt to brainwash Americans into accepting the idea that this nation must remain intact. The line in the Pledge which says One Nation... Indivisible" is clearly a contradiction of Thomas Jefferson's Declaration of Independence, which recognized man's right to change or abolish an existing government, or to secede from one. The Pledge indoctrinates young school children with the silly idea that this country must remain a unity. We conservatives cannot accept that. When the government becomes intolerable, we have a right to change it or to leave it. i can't pledge my allegiance to the idea of One Nation, Indivisible."

Rumors abound that Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson have met with Bannon in an effort to create a united front in an alliance that would refuse to sing the Anthem or say the Pledge. While Jackson and Sharpton willingly accepted Bannon's opposition to the Pledge because it contains the claim that the in America we have "freedom and justice for all." they felt obligated to stand with the NFL protesters in refusing to sing the Anthem.

A third group has expressed an interest in joining with Bannon, Sharpton and Jackson in protesting the Pledge. Atheists United have for years refused to utter the words "under God" when reciting the Pledge. The Anthem, which is neutral on religion, presents no problem for them, but in order to create a more powerful alliance uniting blacks, conservatives and the irreligious, the atheists announced their willingness to protest the Anthem as well.

In the meantime, school children across the country have started kneeling during the Pledge, either as a sign of protest or because it seemed a fun thing to do.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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