Mile High IVF Airways tells cabin crew they will be fired if the fail to get pregnant

Funny story written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 17 June 2015

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Bun in the oven if you're very licky - uh, lucky!

Tampax, Florida - Female Mile High IVF Airways cabin crew have been told they can be sacked if they fail to get pregnant at 33,000 feet.

Three cycles of in vitro fertilization in optimum atmospheric conditions should be enough to suit most women's hatcheries airline CEO Justin Cummings said this morning as he launched the company's latest 'Sunny Side Up' initiative.

Draconian new rules also ban stewardesses getting dropped off at work by useless male twats - such as husbands, lovers or bits-on-the-side - who have consistently fired blanks during conception attempts.

The airline believes negative karma stalks these flaccid men - something that could potentially rub off on their womenfuck - ah, womenfolk! - as well as the paying passengers they serve.

Last year only 40% of the airlines cabin crew got pregnant and that included five hunky male stewards from Brisbane, Australia.

The cost of a Mile High IVF Airways round the world ticket remains a bucket shop bargain at $69,000.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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