Written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 24 February 2015

image for Mystery banker found near university campus baffles cops
A large pile of dirt

Toronto, Canada - A mysterious banker has been found by police close to a York University campus underground tunnel.

Police say they are baffled.

Early reports suggest he was discovered in a secluded wooded area by a conservation officer who said he spotted 'a large pile of dirt'.

Nearby a tunnel some 10 meters (33 feet) long and 2 meters (6½ feet) high was found with plywood wall supports.

The banker also had access to a gas generator, moisture-resistant light bulbs, a sump pump for removing groundwater, a wheelbarrow plus food and drink vessels.

Perhaps a box or two of baby wipes.

Tonight a leading article in the Toronto Evening Tsar said cops additionally discovered a rosary with a Remembrance Day poppy nailed to a wall.

But so far nothing to suggest a criminal element.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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