BILLINGSGATE POST: Following the tragic news of Slim Everdingle losing his leg in a bedroom romp, police in Denver have arrested Annibal Lector, the daughter of the notorious cannibal, Hannibal Lector. Saying that the fruit doesn't fall far from the tree, Police Commissioner, Dave "The Rave" Pottoff, briefed reporters from the jail in downtown Denver.
Pottoff said that they had traced the black Cadillac Esplanade used to drop off the wounded Slim Everdingle to a Ms. Annibal Lector, who was described as being, "somewhat chagrined by the whole episode."
Slim, who had just had his right leg gnawed off by Annibal in a macabre sexual encounter that Everdingle simply described as, "a one-night stand gone bad," was doing quite well under the circumstances. Still reeling from the effects of the Honolulu hash cocktail prescribed, "to loosen-up the couples' hibitations," at the Kiss Ass Bar and Apothecary, he said he was "circling the wagons" while trying to adjust to his missing leg.
When asked by reporters what chance there might be that he and Annibal might get back together again, the taciturn Everdingle replied, "Slim or None. I'm Slim and don't know None. Still have one leg left, though. Hope she won't hold that against me."
PS: There is still no moral to this story.