It was an almost carnival atmosphere this morning at the State House in Raleigh, North Carolina.Journalists from all over the world attended a press conference held by the House of Representatives to announce the passage of legislation approving the hunting of democrats with dogs! Governor Pat McCrory has already signed the bill which is to take effect immediately.
North Carolina is known to be the only state in the union to allow hunting deer with dogs but as the New York Times stated this morning in a front page editorial: "Shocked but not surprised!"
Speaker of the House Reverend T. J. McCorkle strode to the podium and immediately addressed the question of bodily harm to the hunted. "Aint gonna be nobody kilt or even hurt real bad here! Fact is we probably doin em a favor, they aint got no real reason to be here...most of em are Yankees anyways!"
Reporter from the Times of London: "Speaker McCorkle, can we expect to see cars streaming down the highway with human bodies tied to the hoods of the cars?"
McCorkle: "Yep, could be, but aint gonna be no dead bodies...jes putting them in their place so to speak."
Reporter: "But Speaker, with all due respect, what are you going to do with all of these democrats?"
McCorkle: "First of all we aint gonna bother with the blacks and Mexicans, they be the ones to do all the work here. The rest we gonna send out to California to them camps, you know, the ones we put the Japs in, in World War 2. Little fresh air and sunshine will be good for them, jes like it was for them Japs!"
Reporter from the New York Times: "Speaker McCorkle, so your going to let the African Americans and the Latinos vote? They are a big percentage of the Democratic Party."
McCorkle: "Blacks and Mexicans...Sure! All they got to do is pass the new literacy test."
Reporter: New literacy test!?
McCorkle: "Yep! Well," he paused, "it's kinda like the old one, you know, from the good ole days."
Reporter: "And that was...?"
The Speaker of the House of Representatives from the state of North Carolina grinned and replied: "How many grains of sand are there on the beach down at Surf City!"