Written by Catchthisdrift

Thursday, 24 April 2014

image for Area Man Injured By Frying Pan When He Didn't Duck Quickly Enough
Brandy Towers as she and Mead leave the ER

Local resident Dan Mead, 43, was injured Saturday evening when he was struck in the forehead by a cast iron frying pan that had been thrown by his girlfriend. Mr. Mead drove himself to an emergency room and required 11 stitches for the injury.

His assailant, Brandy Towers, 38, admits to having thrown the pan but claims she was not actually trying to hit Mead. She said she was merely trying to make a point about the intensity of her emotions at the time.

During the investigation by police, Mead said "Who does that? I mean, sure you see it in cartoons and old movies. But who actually picks up a frying pan and throws it at someone? And a cast iron one? Geez. I have to hand it to her, though, she was fast and had a good aim. I barely saw it coming, let alone being able to get out of the way. Man that hurt. Getting stitches is pretty cool though."

Towers showed up at the ER approximately 45 minutes after Mead arrived, apparently to give him a ride back to the residence. Towers seemed glib about the incident. She said "Well, I guess he won't be drinking milk straight out of the jug again, don't you think? I really wasn't trying to hit him in the head - maybe the shoulder or stomach. But whew did he drop like a brick. That pan smacked him and he was down. Maybe he won't be such a jerk next time."

Mead did not press charges against Towers.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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