The Overweight May Be Discriminated Against If Religion Based

Funny story written by Keith Shirey

Tuesday, 25 February 2014

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Arizona lawmakers passed a bill Thursday that allows businesses in the state to deny service to LGBT customers on religious grounds. The bill has not been signed by Gov. Jan Brewer (R), who told reporters at the National Governors Association this week that she was in no rush to decide the bill's fate.

Meanwhile, the North Carolina legislature has passed a bill that provides that, if a person has "excessive body fat," they may be refused services or the ability to buy goods from commercial enterprises if the refusal is based on "religious convictions." It awaits the governor's signature.

Assemblyman Harold Hick, who originally proposed the law, stated "The religious liberty interest protected by this act is an important and independent liberty that occupies a preferred position as opposed to the interests of overweight persons."

Mr. Hick then quoted from the Bible: "Proverbs 28 declares, "He who keeps the law is a discerning son, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father." Proverbs 23 declares, "Put a knife to your throat if you are given to gluttony." He concluded that there were substantial religious grounds for the state to provide a religious exemption for discrimination against the overweight.

Assemblymen Hick stated that "spiritually evolved souls" who are offended by people with freckles had contacted him saying that they, too, wanted legislation protecting their religious freedoms. He said they were able to quote many anti-freckle passages from Holy Scripture.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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