After Tragedy, Townspeople Turn Into "Big Bunch of Jerks"

Written by Jeff Brone

Thursday, 24 October 2013

A gas plant explosion in the small town of Highwater, KS is the type of thing that can bring out the best in people. They band together, help each other, generally pitch in and get through the crisis.

Highwater had a different idea, however. The people turned into real first class jerks.

"Boy, I never saw such tools" commented Dub Haskins, the local carpenter and handy man. "Running around, blaming each other, the mayor never even showed up. I heard he was on vacation in Little Rock and didn't have time to come back."

Another citizen, who asked to remain nameless for fear of repercussions, said even the slogan "Highwater Cares," launched after the explosion, was ridiculed by the town. More like "Highwater Blows" he stated, then ran away after throwing an empty beer can on the street.

"Some people cared" added Nellie Tamden, a local little old lady. She then said, "A few, I think. No wait, they were from out of town. Never mind."

As for the future, the residents generally plan to continue to take each other for granted and not learn anything from the experience.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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