Stripper Poll Reveals Disturbing Results

Written by Tony Bagodonutz

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

A recent poll of a large number of women who are employed throughout the nation as exotic dancers (in laymen's terms "strippers") revealed astonishing data regarding the lifestyle of the majority who have chosen this profession.

The poll shows that over 98% of women in the industry do not attend school of any kind.

"This was quite surprising to me," stated Stan, a patron of multiple gentlemen's clubs.

"Some of my favorite dancers had me convinced that they were just working at the club to make money for school. One of them had me believing that she is going to graduate from law school this spring and use her degree to help with animal rights."

Of the large number of women polled, only one in one-hundred thousand stated that they were actually enrolled in an institute of higher education. The term "higher education" of course, is a loosely interpreted term.

Destiny Divine, exotic dancer, stated, "Higher education? Ha ha, honey, I can barely make it to my G.E.D. class, because I'm so wasted most the time. So, if by 'higher education' you mean I'm higher than most in class than, yeah, you're right. I'm in an institution of higher education."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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