Santorum Beats His Wife

Funny story written by JAB

Wednesday, 29 February 2012

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Mitt Romney beat Rick Santorum in the Arizona and Michigan primaries Tuesday night. His dominance over Mr. Santorum in the Republican presidential nominating race may have led to Mr. Santorum taking it out on his wife, Karen, mother to their seven children.

According to some guests at the Check Inn Motel, they heard what sounded like yelling coming from room 67, registered to a Mr. and Mrs. Rick Santorum. One of the guests claims, he heard a male voice saying several times that, "revolver does not have two L's." Another guest, not sure whether she was hearing laughter or crying, phoned the front desk to report the incident, only to be told, "It's a family matter, it's been going on ever since they've been staying at the motel."

A political advisor to Mr. Santorum, questioned about the alleged beating of Mrs. Santorum, acknowledged, "It happens frequently and that his wife Karen is known to sometimes beat him." The advisor went on to say, "It shows that Rick is more in touch with the average voter than Governor Romney."

When asked how so, the advisor, continued, "That everyone who plays Scrabble knows it can improve your memory, enhance your language skills, and exercise your mind muscles for long-term learning and retention."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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