Obamacare Church Compromise Carves Out Muff-Diving And Buggery

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Friday, 17 February 2012

Hey!

The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Obamacare Church Compromise Carves Out Muff-Diving And Buggery
Fat Chance

BILLINGSGATE POST - Arguments over the proclamation by President Obama that mandates church affiliated employers provide birth control benefits to their employees reached a high fever pitch in the House of Representatives yesterday as lesbians and gays demanded to know why they shouldn't be given the same benefits as heterosexuals for their own recreational sex.

Although Obama backed off somewhat when he announced that he would flip the responsibilty of providing coverage from the employer to the insurance company, this did nothing to placate lesbians and gays who felt miffed because their recreational sex practices were included in the carve-out, because, as Obama diplomatically pointed out:

"Muff-diving and buggery would not ordinarily result in conception unless divine intercession took place."

"Fat chance," echoed Catholic Church historian, Rev. Thigbee Barnicle, who went on to explain that there is no bonafide record of this happening. Citing Vatican records that go back for centuries, Rev. Thigbee added:

"To put this in perspective, the chance of divine intercession in such cases is in direct proportion to ever finding President Obama's original birth certificate."

NOTE: The information for this story was provided by Media Doesn't Matter Any More.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more