Written by susan allen-rosario

Tuesday, 20 December 2011

image for Plumbers protest "butt crack" ordinance
"Showing our butt crack is not about attitude."

When Mason Williams was issued a $50 fine for wearing a pair of low rider pants, he got a little pissed off. Pissed off enough to work on creating a new law of his own, "The saggin' butt crack ordinance."

Mason was offended that he had to pay the fine for wearing his pants low when daily his dad gets away with taunting the law every time he bends over. His dad, a commercial plumber, butt crack exposure boarders on criminal, Mason claims.

"My dad is the worst offender of this law. Who needs to see that? Why do I have to look at his punk ass and he don't have to see mine? The man ain't no hipster. The man needs to buy a belt."

Mason's dad says the reason he can sag and Mason can't is exactly that,

"He ain't no hipster. It's every plumber's God given right to show a little tail."

Mason's dad is so proud of his tail that he has a tattoo over his butt crack that reads; "My sideways smile is just for you." "It was either that or a butterfly; "he told reporters. Other plumbers in the area say they will fight Mason in the courts if he is successful in his attempts to enact a new law.

"Showing our butt crack is not about attitude, just a problem with gravity. It is not personal expression. We don't mean to be indecent." Other plumbers say they are tired of being the butt end of all the jokes.

"It's an issue of comfort not style, people need to get over it."

"If it is about comfort, why is my dad wearing a thong? He's doing it just to piss me off. There is nothin' comfortable about having a rope ride up your ass every time you bend over. The man's a menace."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: bum, Plumbers

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