Written by Ellis Ian Fields

Monday, 11 July 2011

image for Northampton Residents Up In Arms Over Mystery Blonde
What's wrong with Northampton? We should be told.

The nationwide quest to get to the bottom of the mystery blonde conundrum has upset the people of Northampton.

The woman has been sighted at various locations around the country, but Northamptoners are annoyed that she has not appeared in their town.

"It's a diabolical liberty is what it is," said Dave Plank of Empire Way. "The bint has been seen everywhere but here. What's wrong with Northampton, for Pete's sake?"

Mrs Margaret Stalingrad, of Grebe Terrace, Boothville, agreed: "It doesn't seem right, somehow.

"I thought I saw the mystery blonde this morning in Curl Up & Dye in the shopping mall, but when I went in to check, it was only that Lauren Crevice - you know? Norm and Greta's girl? And there's no mystery about her, if you know what I mean."

Mr Plank added: "What I want to know is what are the council and the MP doing about it? People are getting very angry - 'specially down the pub."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: mystery blonde

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