Simon Cowell May Be Replacing X-Factor Judge Dannii Minogue With His Fiancee Mezhgan Hussainy

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 18 March 2011

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image for Simon Cowell May Be Replacing X-Factor Judge Dannii Minogue With His Fiancee Mezhgan Hussainy
One of Simon Cowell's security guards standing in front of his mansion in Surrey, England. (Photo by Cat Deely).

LONDON - Since the departure of X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole to America to be with her boyfriend Derek Hough, aka "The Dancing Dude" Simon Cowell has been trying to figure out who to replace Chezza with.

And although he has not yet made his final decision on who will replace her he is now seriously considering replacing X-Factor judge Dannii Minogue as well.

Cowell was quick to note that Minogue is not leaving the show of her own volition but he feels that he cannot continue having her as one of the judges because of extremely personal reasons known only to him.

When a reporter for Tickety Boo News asked Simon to elaborate on the personal reasons why Ms. Minogue may be terminated, Cowell took a puff of his cigarette, smiled, and said that he was not going to go there.

He then reminded TBN's Neville Twickenbuck that he had learned his lesson last year when he fired Ellen DeGeneres and Kara DioGuardi from American Idol.

Cowell did point out that he has received word from Prince William that his soon-to-be bride Kate Middleton will not be available to replace Cheryl Cole as Cowell had hoped.

William noted that Kate will be much too busy trying to have a little William or a little Kate plus running a castle is no easy task and it really and truly leaves very little free time.

And so Simon has informed TBN that if things come down to the wire, he will hire his fiancee Mezhgan Hussainy to take Dannii Minogue's place. And he will probably call up his ex-girlfriend Pixie Lott and ask her to take Cheryl Cole's old judge's job.

Tickety Boo News will stay on top of this on going dilemma which Simon Cowell has said has caused him to lose three pounds and turned some of his chest hair gray.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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