Cameron admits advisor appointment was a "disastrous decision"

Written by Kate_UK

Sunday, 6 March 2011

David Cameron has today been forced to admit that his appointment of a controversial economic adviser was a mistake. The adviser was behind some of the recent unpopular "austerity measures" but it appears that his credentials may not have been fully checked at the time of the appointment.

"I'll 'fess's been a disaster from start to finish" said Cameron in a press conference today

The PM claims that the Gungan advisor came with an impressive CV - including policy making at the Senate - and a raft of good references.

Says Cameron "I should have known that some of the references were not entirely plausible. I mean "Mesa really good at economics"? How did I not see through that? It's written in the first person and everything. Someone in HR is going down for this, I'm telling you."

Mr Binks has confessed that he was not entirely honest when applying for the job. In a terse statement released today, he said "It's a longo taleo buta small part of it would be mesa... fraudulent".

It has since emerged that, while Mr Binks was genuinely employed at the Galactic Senate, his political career there was also dogged with controversy including "being directly responsible for the formation of the evil empire" and "making inappropriate jokes".

Binks claims this was all a "long time ago" but with a Prime Minister keen to "learn lessons from history", surely he shouldn't dismiss such past mistakes? Mr Binks and Mr Cameron have since met, for a session of "full disclosure", which has left Mr Cameron reeling at the revelations. During the session, several tea cups were broken due to the Gungan's infamous clumsiness

This scandal may have rocked the PM, but other significant figures in Whitehall seem barely surprised at all. "Binks never fit in here" claims one senior civil servant "I mean just look at him! I know that a lot of people nowadays have eschewed the three piece suit in favour of the two piece, but traditionally it's the waistcoat that's left off, not the jacket. And then to not even wear a shirt or tie?! I knew there was something wrong. No-one wants to see Gungan nipples over the Downing St coffee machine, do they?"

It is no secret that members of Mr Cameron's own party have long felt uncomfortable about his reliance on such an unconventional advisor.

Of course, Mr Binks has also been embroiled in his own expenses scandal when it emerged that his second home in Naboo, which he claimed was "far far away" was actually in Hertfordshire and thus easily commutable via the overland to Elephant and Castle.

This latest scandal is almost certain to have ended Mr Binks' political career, yet again. His future is uncertain but his clich├ęd and borderline offensive Jamaican patois could see him secure a part in controversial CBeebies show Rastamouse.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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