Written by Simon Cole

Tuesday, 21 December 2010

image for Gordon Brown to the rescue, again
Brown's efforts seem to make matters worse

At Heathrow last night, a lone figure was seen waving his arms as the occasional plane taxied past. Gordon Brown, with ear muffs and a day-glow yellow vest over his white mac had used his House of Commons pass to get onto the tarmac.

One of his minders, sheltering in the terminal, explained: "He has bouts when he thinks he is still Prime Minister. He told us this morning he was going to take a positive stand, direct the planes, and put things right. Last week he was phoning that bloody Mandy all the time, telling him he was making him Minister for Climate Change and he had better pull his bloody finger out and change it."

A spokesman for Lord Mandelson's office would only issue a written statement saying: His Lordship does have occasional conversations with the former Prime Minister, but we can not reveal the content. It may well be they talk about the weather.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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