Pontiff Admits Using Dope-A-Pope to Foil Would-be Assassins

Funny story written by Moose

Friday, 17 September 2010

image for Pontiff Admits Using Dope-A-Pope to Foil Would-be Assassins
Pope Benedict Posed as Male Prostitute to Capture Terrorists

LONDON, UK - Anti-terrorism police arrested six men on Friday on suspicion of preparing an attack on the Pope.

Police moved quickly to make the pre-dawn arrests of five men in central London where the pontiff later spoke:

Your Majesty,

Thank you for your gracious invitation to make an official visit to the United Kingdom and for your warm words of greeting on behalf of the British people. In thanking Your Majesty, allow me to extend my own greetings to all the people of the United Kingdom and to hold out a hand of friendship to each one, except those six Islamo-fascists who tried to whack me off.

As you know, these towel-heads from Algeria dressed as street-cleaners in order to assassinate my holy arse. I foiled them by acting as a male-prostitute and ingesting Rohypnol. When they attempted to take advantage of me, my 12-year-old Acolyte companion whacked them with my holy chalice.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more