Blair Finds Out Who He Is

Funny story written by j.w.

Monday, 19 July 2010

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The McBlairs of ancient Scotland

Tony Blair's ancestry has been unearthed for the TV programme 'Who Do You Think You Are?' and will lead to a fascinating programme.

The Scottish roots of the Blair's, formerly the McBlairs, provide a McBlair Tartan and even a McBlair Clan. They were in conflict for many years with the McBruins. The conflict between these two Clans was caused by a dispute over who should wear the Tartan, which both Clans claimed was their own.

Eventually, after a prominent McBruin held a prominent McBlair by the balls the McBlairs had to accept defeat.

But the McBruins suffered so many casualties in their brief reign their enemies, who combined together to oust them from power, ended the McBruins for ever.

Other shocks awaited Tony Blair. He found he was related to Lionel Blair, the dancer/entertainer and Eric Blair (who disguised himself as George Orwell).

Tony thought he might find some skeletons in the cupboard, but he hadn't anticipated anything as bad as this. 'Dancing shoes are too much for me to stand' he mumbled about Lionel. As for Orwell Tony exploded: 'He was some some sort of Socialist wasn't he? I can't see how I could possibly have been related to him.'

Extraordinarily there is also a mention in ancient manuscripts of a Blair Witch, a friend of Macbeth's - otherwise known as 'The Prince of Darkness'. The Blair Witch excelled at stirring a cauldron of poison crying 'Cherry trees and ears of Cows will come to kill all our fowes'.

Tony Blair quite shaken by these discoveries exclaimed : 'I am glad to leave all these genealogical tales behind me.'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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