Many people have been sacked from their jobs by a Sausageshire council simply on the basis of their surnames, in what has been described by councilors as "a move to promote secularism" and "bollocks" by towns folk.
Quexham town council, Sausageshire, say they have sacked employees for having "potentially objectionable" surnames which may offend secularists and religious and cultural minorities.
Quexham town council said that as a secular and 21st century council it was quite ridiculous to have council employees possessing surnames that could be construed as religious or even offensive to other communities.
Nurse
Deborah Christian a nurse employed by the town's state primary school was told that her surname could be seen as offensive to non-christian children within the school.
"I don't blame the school at all, the decision was out of their hands. I think it's a shame that decent people can be stopped from helping our community over this latest piece of PC effluence", Deborah Christian.
Sweeper
Brian Parson a road sweeper for Quexham council was sacked because the name 'Parson' was an old word for priest and the council will not be perceived as having ties to the church.
Intollerance
Madeleine McSherry of Quexham town council had this to say:
"I appreciate why some people may be upset about losing their jobs, and Quexham council is very grateful for their hard work and long service. However, people have to understand that intollerence is not tollerated anymore. Promoting Christianity over paganism say, even with a surname is disgusting. We have to promote the perception of secularism amongst the constituents."
Hate-mail
The council have apparently been sent letters from angry locals demanding an explanation as to why Kulvinder Singh, a doctor at the Hattie Jacques general Hospital (NHS), has not been sacked when everyone knows that 'singh' means 'sikh' or something.
The council have forwarded the hate-mail and the writers' addresses on to the Anti-terrorism branch of the metropolitan police and to anti-racism campaigners.
Terrorising terror?
"Objection to this is very worrying indeed, it shows that there is a racist and bigoted minority, potentially militant and we would hate to see an act of terrorism or violence in Sausageshire so we are involving the appropriate agencies", Peregrine Knoxley, MP (LAB)
Other local government administrations and town councils accross the United Blairdom are considering similar plans to the controversial move of Quexham council.
