Baroness Thatcher has announced to her stunned followers that she has converted to Socialism following a whirlwind romance with Fidel Castro. One shocked Thatcherite said "She came back from Havana a changed woman. I don't know if it was the beard or the cigars that did it, but she insisted on calling everyone comrade-even Tebbit!"
Thatcher has started drinking mugs of tea with trade union leaders and singing the red flag at every available opportunity. In an interview with Dale Winton she said "I see things more clearly now. The workers' control of the means of production is much more important than the sale of council houses. What a fool I was. And I was so nasty to that nice Mr Kinnock."
Followers of Thatcher are said to be near to suicide following the loss of their totem figurehead. John Redwood is currently threatening to jump off Tower Bridge. a large crowd has gathered and picnicers are waiting for him to land.
