The Socialist Party of Great Britain has ordered its members to go on strike, in order to protest about the fact that they received only 500 votes in the last general election.
Their spokesman, Mr Waaaank, spoke exclusively to me today (they don't have a leader because they are too indecisive).
"We are striking for a number of reasons. Firstly because we just love to strike. Striking is every socialist's dream, you get to sit around all day feeling smug and self-satisfied and morally superior to your employer."
"But the reason why we called this strike is to protest that hardly anyone voted for us in the last election. There is a general election in the UK this year and we need the publicity. So none of us in the party are going to do anything at all to work towards the election. We are all officially on strike."
"More than that, we are giving our potential voters a view of what Britain would be like under the Socialist party. There would be strikes all the time. Did your boss not greet you warmly enough this morning? You strike. Was the office coffee machine making imperfect beverages? You strike. Imagine that, the whole country just frozen in a selfish display of demanding more. It would be great."
"So please vote for us this summer. Or even better, go on strike and don't vote at all. Remember socialism doesn't work, it strikes."
