Public outcry over cost of protecting Britain's most hated

Funny story written by nigmuncher

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

image for Public outcry over cost of protecting Britain's most hated
Young thugs prowl our streets

Public opinion was unanimous in its condemnation today, as it was revealed by the press that one of Britain's most hated men, and many of his closest cohorts are being given round the clock police protection rumoured to be costing the British taxpayer millions of pounds every year.

Families living in fear on sink estates across the country want to know why this thug, his running dogs and their families are getting such cosseting whilst they have to run life's gauntlet of fear on the UK's crime riddled streets.

Middle class suburban enclaves are agog at the amount of money being wasted on these pariahs, when they themselves are forced to pay thousands of pounds for security fencing and surveillance cameras, just to keep themselves safe from the nightly thieves who steal through unguarded windows to wreak havoc with the lives of the law-abiding.

Pensioners, huddled in front of their one bar electric fires, cower at every noise; every sign of movement outside their doors, fearing the gangs of drug crazed young thugs that prowl the streets in search of easy prey.

'Why oh why', cries the ordinary man in the street, 'should this man and his hangers on be given the protection that should be the birthright of every British citizen, but is not?'

Should we leave him to his fate, or continue to pour public funds into this black hole of unpopular expenditure?

Will we treat the next one with the same sycophantic obsequiousness, or will we leave David Cameron to his fate?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more