Halt! Who goes bare?

Funny story written by nigmuncher

Monday, 19 October 2009

image for Halt! Who goes bare?
authentic 'police' uniform

Government plans to streamline the police/terrorist/catchum/beatum interface were last night called into question when it was revealed that 'plastic policemen' better known to a few governmental quangos, and no bugger else, as "Police Community Support Officers" were to have their uniforms brought into line with our highly trained (yeah right) bobbies on the beat.

Apparently Unison; one of the UK's plethora of Neolithic union movements, believes that the PCSO's would gain much more respect and cooperation from the public if they were to wear the same uniforms as police officers.

Quick to quell the understandable backlash to this vacuous and ill judged statement, the Police Federation, has mooted the idea that it might be more productive and more in line with public opinion of the PCSO's if they were to go about there duties naked.

The chairman of the Police Federation, Jan Berry, told our reporter that, and I quote, "These contemptible faux coppers are neither use nor ornament. The public think they are less than useless, and who wants an unqualified, untrained dole dodger telling them what to do? I think it would raise their profile in the public eye if the man in the street could see what they were really made of."

Stop, who goes bare?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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