In a spectacular own-goal, Harriett Harman, Equalities Minister (read man-bashing) has declared war on lap dancing as a legitimate business expense.
This was intended as a skirmish in her all-out war on men in general and on men enjoying themselves in particular.
She has only succeeded in angering all the interested parties: the clubs that profit from the business, the "punters" who go home with empty wallets, the criminal gangs that "protect" the establishments - and most of all, the lesbian brotherhood!
"We love lap dancing clubs" explains Eddie Catflap, the lead lesbian of her netball and hockey club "and we demand the right to leer at scantily clad girls who writhe against us until we shove tenners up their G strings and claim it on expenses".
Ms Harman, a noted feminist harridan, has apologised to the Council of Lesbian Information Teams (CLIT) and has said that lesbians will from now on receive 2 weekly lapdance vouchers tax free to be inserted in G strings as appropriate.