Famed British submarine, HMS Cunniligus, was beaten by the Italian entry, Fellatio, in Wednesday's International Submarine Races held off the Greek coast.
"It was the third time this month that the Cunniligus was licked," said Cunnilingus's Commander, Sir Ron Paul XI. "But we're not out of the race yet," he said. "We're like a Timex watch; we take a licking and keep on ticking," the proud British sailor told TheSpoof.com's ace, oral sex reporter, Skoob1999.
The US entry, USS Uranus, came in a distant third place, yet remains a popular favorite to win the competition. "I know my ship and my crew," said Captain Bill E. Goat. "Uranus is ready for all comers," he shouted to an enthusiastic Greek crowd.
The French, German, Russian and Columbian submarines were eliminated early in this year's competition.