London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Baroness Thatcher has been discharged from the Royal Freak Hospital's A&E department following an arm fracture sustained during frantic whitewashing activities in the Kinga Legg murder cover-up in Paris.
Mrs T was discovered by her son Mark 'sodden with drink', her hands jammed inside a document shredder trying to retrieve a Swiss bank account chequebook last used to pay off Ms Legg's doorstep debt collecting agents.
She emerged from hospital with Plaster of Paris Hilton covering up a secret PIN number tattoo for her Bernard Madoff transactions repository.
Kinga Legg died in the Hotel Bristol Palin's Pinochet Honeymoon Suite following a successful $50 million cocaine bust by French drug squad officers.
A former boyfriend, Ian Griffin, is 99% certain to take the rap on manslaughter charges.