The time is fast approaching when pupils sit for their final exams before entering the big wide world. A time for revision, revision and more revision and then some. Brains can easily explode when they are overloaded with information which may never be used again.
God cares for his children and wants them to succeed; and those who attend Church of England schools are being offered divine assistance with the only proviso being to ask him.
A spokesman for the Richard Dawkins School of higher education, Professor Ivan Idea, ridiculed the proposal and questioned its legitimacy.
The Professor told In Seine News; "the notion of that of asking someone who is not there is quite absurd, ridiculous and a sheer waste of time. It is very archaic, and something you would expect the Victorians to do. Mankind has grown up since then. Hey... this is the 21st century and the further away from God you get, the higher grades we get. Statistics will tell us that 99% of all schools to achieve four or more A-levels at A**."
"Back in the days when the teacher used to smack the children and they were held back a year for misbehaviour in class, and when children used slates and slide rules, examinations were so hard to pass. Back in those days believing in some deity would not help would it?"
"Whether prayer helps, remains to be seen! Oooh... look at that flash of lightning!!!" He added.
