A driver who reportedly drove through Derbyshire streets at speeds in excess of 170mph has been spared jail because his car could not go that fast. The judge accepted that local police must have been imagining things, paving the way for future drivers to use the defense: "What, in this piece of shit? You must be joking!"
Mr Tex O'Reilly argued that police were just trying to give him a bad name. "Look, my car can only do about 120mph so what is the fuss about?"
We pointed out to Mr O'Reilly that the speed limit on that particular stretch of road was 55mph.
"And?" said Mr O'Reilly.
Henry Toad of Slimy Toad Solicitors successfully defended Mr O'Reilly on the grounds that he was very rich, too important and did not really give a shit. However Mr O'Reilly did plead guilty to being in possession of a bloody silly name. He was sentenced to 6 months community service at Brooklands racetrack.
