A new statue of the Queen Mother by controversial sculptor Philip Jackson was unveiled today.
The statue shows the Queen Mother in her heyday, holding a betting slip in one hand a glass of gin in the other.
"It captures the essence of one's mother exquisitely," the Queen announced as she pulled the cord that revealed the cast bronze statue to the waiting crowds at Haydock racecourse near Preston.
Around the feet of the statue are the Queen Mother's two favourite race horses, Sozzled Senseless and Bladdered Beyond Belief, rearing rampant.
Visitors at the race course were less than impressed.
"It makes her look like a gambling alcoholic," said Betty Slip. "That's not the way I remember her at all. She was a sweet old granny, not some race track addicted whore to the demon drink. I don't think it reflects her at all."
A spokesman for the palace claimed that public perception of the Queen Mother has never matched her actual personality, and that Spitting Image had it closer in the 1980s. He added that the statue had been specially designed to take up to ten traffic cones, and that there was a slot for disposing of used betting slips in the bottom.
