The British Prime Minister has complained that cartoons always show him as a fat bastard, when in fact, he has held the title of the slimmer of the year for the past 10 years.
A source close to Gordon Brown has disclosed that he is actually the thinnest and fittest person in his fabulous country.
Gordon said that being fat is a global problem and that the real fat bastards actually live in the far-off country called America.
Astonishing as it seems, he confided, some Americans weigh over 100 pounds and eat up to three meals a day!
In direct contrast with this, thanks to Gordon's competent handling of the economy, the British people weigh less than 50 pounds and are so poor that they only get one bowl of oats a day.
Gordon expressed his delight that he presided over a country that was full of lean, mean and fit citizens and that his New Labour party would continue to destroy the economy and pay starvation wages until all the voters became healthy.
Asked what he intended to do with the cartoonists who exaggerated his weight, Gordon indicated that he would send them to the recently refurbished, luxury hotel resort at Guantanamo Bay
