Doctor Seymour Kuntz of the University of Alabama today announced that dietary choices have a direct correlation with a state of happiness.
Previous wisdom has dictated that diets are usually depressing things, reliant on such antiquated concepts as abstainance and self restraint.
"Not so," announced Doctor Kuntz. "In fact there is a dietary system known as the Phu-Kit diet, which advises that dieters drink as much premium strength continental lager as they can handle, smoke as many cigarettes as they like, eat all the pies they can take, have fevered sex as often as possible and occasionally use recreational drugs."
"But does that guarantee happiness?" we challenged.
"Oh yes," said Doctor Kuntz. "Mind you, you'll probably be dead by the time you're twenty seven. But you'll die happy."
More as we get it.
