Dustbin Remains Unemptied For Third Week

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 16 December 2008

image for Dustbin Remains Unemptied For Third Week

A dustbin in Wrexham remained uncollected for a third week today, in what local Council officers have called "an oversight".

Geraint Whitehead, the tenant whose bin it is, told reporters his rubbish had been piling up like "nobody's business" since mid-November, but still no solution had been found.

"Neighbours don't like it," said a perplexed Mr Whitehead, adding, just a split second later, "it's beginning to pong a bit."

There is so much rubbish in the bin, that the lid cannot close, and neighbours say that local rats have given up scavenging from it, so bad is the smell.

Mr Whitehead, who lives in The Dunks area of the city, is mystified as to why the Council 'keep forgetting' to empty his bin, but local residents claim they know the reason.

One, Arthur Pint, said:

"It's 'is kippers. That's all he eats, you see. Kippers. Breakfast, dinner and tea. Kippers. Supper as well, I shouldn't wonder!"

Nick Vickerless, of Wrexham County Borough Council, denied this, and said the Council's Refuse Collection and Cleansing Operatives (dustmen) would 'definitely' empty the bin 'soon'.

He said:

"We have no problem with kippers. Shitty nappies - now that would be a problem."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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