Home Secretary Jacqui Smith is sick and tired of having to pay for sex and even fork over a quid just for a little shimmy on the lap. Smith will try to restore the time honored British tradition of coming home from the Home Secretary's office after a hard day's labour and gettin' a little free tail:
"It'll soon be three free shakes of your little lambiekin's tail for every hungry for some matin' mate on John Bull's Island. There will be no more payin for sex. From now on we go back to the British tradition of begging, pleading and whining for sex. It's so much more dignified and it will free up household income for more essential purposes like prostitution and visits to the local pub/ titty bar!"
