The latest book in the 'for Dummies' series - those bright yellow books on a range of subjects for the uninitiated - "Dummies for Dummies", is being published and launched today by literary giant Tara Palmer-Dumbkinson at the Acme Book Shop in Bognor Regis.
Published specifically to help dummies get their heads around the range of existing Dummies books, these 16-page publications highlight, in sentences containing no more that 14 consecutive monosyllabic words, how to buy a "for Dummies" book.
Tara Palmer-Dumbkinson explains:
"I was delighted, excited and ignited to be invited to launch this important book. Words wot I writ are aimed at people wot have little or no brain power anyway. At least that's what Hortense Flumbly-Smitherson from the Dummies' Institute told me when we went to the new Numpty's Bar in Soho last night. We saw Brian Chav. He owns a yacht and regularly sails it in the Diana memory fountain in London. Gets the bottom of his designer jeans wet all the time though. Numpty's is a well good bar, innit?
"People is getting dumber and dumber - that was a great film innit? - that Flora Robson and John Gielgud was great in it - anyway, as I was saying, people is getting dumber and dumber, wot with texting and auto spelling and the like, innit? There's some people who can't even spell their own national insurance number when filling in their Job Centre claim forms, innit?
"I hope that if people read this book, or at least someone good with words can read it out to them, they'll be able to get on with life and buy Jimmy Choo shoes from Harv' Nick's without having to read the labels, innit?"