London - (Ass Mess): Lawyers acting for the accused in the 'gay minor royal £50,000 crack cocaine blackmail video' case have slammed British justice for favoring the totally anonymous and unnamed son of the late Princess Margaret.
The alleged 'victim' will not be appearing in court tomorrow when the trial opens.
He has also ensured the accused have languished on remand in jail for the last six months, has applied to freeze all their assets ahead of a pending civil defamation suit and is now buggering off on a royal handout holiday to the Caribbean for the next three weeks.
However, in a last minute change of heart, a clutch of witnesses has now come forward who will testify that the snotty little royal (sic) upstart is a doppelganger impostor - and the bastard son of Lord Levy to boot.
"So much for bleedin' puppet monarchy privilege then," was the only coment from Wormwood Scrubs remand wing this week where the defendants are readying to go the full fifteen rounds at the Old Bailey.
Jeffrey Archer is 68.